OWH NO!!!

it scares me to bits...it makes me feel nauseous inside...i could feel the food welling up my oesophagus....uurrggghhh!!! no more!!! no more!!
i guess that differentiates me and them....maybe sooo...
i am not taught the traditional stuff,i guess it makes me feel a bit self-centred.
they are even talking about plans...i DON'T HAVE PLANS!!!!!
i don't even wanna think of the plans...i wanna stay like this forever....a kid..some childish,thank youh very much!
maybe the future scares me...being all grownup scares me...
i guess that makes me feel the one out....
my head is spinning..their words keep on playing on repeat in my mind..i don't really mind....but it makes me want to roll my eyes...i don't want to...but that is the way i am...i am afraid of saying my opinions out loud...makes me the one in the dark...and before i am LEFT in the dark,i will go to the dark on my own...i'll lead my way....
cause i know the way like the back of my hands....
i have always felt like the weird one..owh no...never their fault...i just feel that way sometimes..and i had someone who have understands me...but he is not here anymore...he is not there,eventhough he promised to be there....
he has his own problems.....
i don't even remember how he went out of my life...sooo sudden....like he just dropped by to say hi....
oowwhhh well..life goes on....
and i have...





:)